Different tune, same old sexism: what kids are learning from pop music

Posted on May 2, 2013 by admin
Recently I attended a fantastic fundraiser for the Women’s Support Project, at which comedian and national treasure Elaine C Smith explored the role of pop music in shaping our culture’s attitude to gendered violence and abuse, and to women’s role in society. She sang us a few examples of truly sexist songs, such as the Burt Bacharach classic ‘Wives and Lovers’, which warns women to stay attentive and beautiful to prevent their men from straying:

“Hey, little girl, comb your hair, fix your make-up, soon he will open the door,Don’t think because there’s a ring on your finger, you needn’t try any more.For wives should always be lovers too, Run to his arms the moment that he comes home to you.I’m warning you.”

This song was written in 1963. 50 years later, have things changed much? I’d argue that people are still singing and humming the same kind of damaging ditties – there might be a different tune but pop music still exhibits the same old sexism.

Until my kids got into music, I was pretty unaware of what the kids were listening to these days. As a thirty-something indie-kid who grew up and got a job and somehow stopped listening to music all the time (more radio 4 than radio 1) I was out of touch. But we’ve had a bit of a pop party going on at home lately, as my 6 and 8 year old have got more interested in pop music and culture, and it’s been a bit of a shock to discover that much to the music marketed at and loved by kids is trotting out the same old sexist rubbish that has been a feature of pop music for decades.

The top pop choice for 6 year olds about town is One Direction, who sing in ‘What Makes you Beautiful’ about being overwhelmed by the way a girl flicks her hair, and by the way she smiles at the ground  – swoon,  she’s so demure! She has no idea she’s beautiful! And that, folks, is what makes her beautiful. If she knew she was a fantastic girl she would probably be a pain and not at all attractive, is the not-so-subtle message of that number one hit.  Funnily enough they never sing, the way you got an A in maths makes my heart flip, or the way you tell jokes really cracks me up – remember girls, it’s all about being beautiful and then boys will like you and that’s what counts. Oh, and who cares if you actually find members of the same sex beautiful? – the world of teen pop is one in which gay relationships are completely invisible.

Another One Direction song that kids love is ‘Little Things’ – my daughter went to an Easter holiday club where she and her 6-10 year old pals learned it off by heart at their song and dance class. It was a lovely class, but I sad to hear little girls singing “You’ve never loved your stomach or your thighs” – I don’t want my kid to start getting the message that she should worry about parts of her body that are perfectly fine and healthy and functioning.  She is more than her body parts.

I was equally upset by hearing her sing along with a Justin Bieber song. He’s the teen sensation with more twitter followers than any other celebrity (more than 38 million) and a huge army of devoted ‘beliebers’. He sings Boyfriend: a song that includes the lyrics “If I was your boyfriend, I’d never let you go”. Erm, what if I wanted to go Justin? What then? How about we both get to choose if this relationship ends?

A common trope of the music industry is that bad boys are innately appealing. See for example ‘Bad Boys’ by Alexandra Burke, (“Yeah, the bad boys are always catching my eye, I said the bad boys are always spinning my mind, Even though I know they’re no good for me,  It’s the risk I take for the chemistry”), which can be traced all the way back to Leader of the Pack, from 1964 (“They told me he was bad, But I knew he was sad, That’s why I fell for the leader of the pack”).

I recently saw this message updated for the tween generation on kids TV programme ‘Friday Download’. On the episode that aired on CBBC on 26 April 2013, presenter Dionne Bromfield covered the Olly Murs’ song, Troublemaker:

“Trouble troublemaker, yeah, That’s your middlename, I know you’re no good but you’re stuck in my brainAnd I wanna know, Why does it feel so good but hurt so bad…My mind keeps saying, Run as fast as you can, I say I’m done but then you pull me back”.

There is something spectacularly creepy about seeing a teenage girl singing to a roomful of pre-teen children (on a channel aimed at 4-12s) that a troublemaker who hurts you is so appealing that you can’t really get away from them.  In a culture where domestic abuse and stalking are frighteningly mundane (two women a week are killed by partners or ex-partners in the UK), singing a catchy tune about someone who’s trouble also being addictive to a roomful of kids is pretty irresponsible, not to say depressing. I used my parental rights to the off-switch on that occasion but how many parents were busy making the tea while their kids innocently danced along and have no idea what messages their kids are learning through music?

If you think the lyrics are bad, try watching the videos. Troubled by the usual dilemma of choosing whether to be a ‘good mum’ who protects my kid from sexist nonsense or a ‘nice mum’ who gets my daughter one of the things she really, really wants, I caved in and bought Pop Party 10 to add to her Christmas pressie pile. It came with a DVD of videos. We watched the videos together, my horror mounting.

I tried to see the positive and grab a ‘teachable moment’.  When I asked, why do you think Cheryl Cole is wearing so few clothes and everyone else has got jackets on? she thankfully said, “maybe she just doesn’t feel the cold mummy” – but such innocence can’t last forever, and the unspoken message that women need to show off their bodies for male approval must be sinking in, however unconsciously.  I told her about my concerns, and the DVD has been ‘lost’ for the time being, but in many homes across the country girls will be watching this stuff over and over, learning the words, learning the moves, and basically learning how to be good little sex objects who need the approval of boys and men to get ahead in this world. Meanwhile boys will be learning that girls need to be sexy for their approval (though I am glad my son mishears Psy in ‘Gangnam Style’ as singing about ‘sixty ladies’) and that they will be calling the shots when they have girlfriends in the future.

There is nothing new under the sun, and worrying about the music kids listen to is an age-old problem but we live in a new world of instant downloads, lyric websites, bluetoothed video clips, connecting with our favourite celebrities on twitter and listening to music on smartphones – a world in which pop culture is everywhere and inescapable. So it seems only right to start listening carefully and watching critically and making sure that we know what our kids are learning through music. And if it’s not what we want them to learn about healthy, respectful relationships with people who we see as fully rounded human beings with qualities other than looks, maybe it’s time to reach for the off-switch. And music producers, lyric writers, and singers – please change the record – 50 years on from Burt’s ‘warning’ it’s dreary in the extreme to hear sexism and misogyny still topping the charts.

- Jenny Kemp, Zero Tolerance Coordinator

Posted in Early Years, Feminism, Gender, children, media | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

The BBC, CNN and Rape Culture

Posted on March 21, 2013 by admin

Well what have the past few weeks taught me? Unfortunately that rape culture is alive and kicking; and no, this is not a swipe at horrific ‘UniLad’ and disgusting online rape ‘jokes’ that have exploded onto our timelines and tumblrs. No, this particular rage at rape culture is thrown squarely in the face of our ‘western’ media.

I’ll start at home. Last week the BBC, you know the one “to inform, educate and entertain”, and funded by us, the taxpayer, received a new report from the Crown Prosecution detailing how media and public perceptions of false rape reports propagate “dangerous myths” and said the problem was far less common than thought. So what did the BBC do with this information that the media was peddling dangerous lies? It peddled some more. Unlike The Guardian, Huffington Post, and even The Daily Mail, among many others, the BBC went with the headline “False rape claims ‘devastating’ says wrongly accused” and in the second sentence described “just how common the problem is”. COMMON?! ‘Common’ is what they got from a report explaining just how rare false allegations of rape are. Whilst there is no argument that false allegations are surely devastating for the accused and should be treated accordingly, let me reiterate: based on a report detailing the rarity of made up rape allegations, and the effects of saying otherwise, the BBC chose to frame a whole article around how awful and common these allegations are. I truly despair. Luckily, twitter was quickly alight, demanding an apology and correction. I too encouraged others to complain and complain we did, in vast numbers. However, the reply I received was less than encouraging; here is a small excerpt:

“I do not agree we misrepresented the study, or published an article that might somehow put people off reporting such serious crimes. However, having considered feedback, I agree we were not clear enough in our wording. For clarity we have changed a word in the second sentence from “common” to “unusual”.”

So rather than take on board anything that was said and issue a proper correction and apology they kept the entire article but (thankfully, I guess) changed their false assertion that the problem was ‘common’ to ‘unusual’. Here is a screen shot of the before and after:

Thanks BBC, I’m glad you have been taking your recent sex scandals and cover-ups seriously.

Over the pond now and to a news story that you probably can’t have missed. This week two young men were found guilty of the rape of a Steubenville teenager. The story goes that a young woman was raped, filmed and humiliated by a number of partygoers, who later posted the footage online, alongside words like ‘dead body’, ‘rape’ etc. Two of these perpetrators were, later found guilty and sentenced to one, and two years respectively. End of story? No. Not only had the small town and police already been accused of trying to hush up the story from the beginning, and extreme victim blaming (she was underage and drinking), before the story exploded online thanks to intrepid bloggers and feminist news sites. But what lies at the bottom of this whole story is the two young men in question were star football players and local town heroes, and generally it was accepted that there was one rule for athletes, another for everyone else. But what was truly sickening about the sentencing of these boys was that upon the verdict being given many media outlets in the US expressed exclusive sympathy for the rapists. ABC aired a glowing profile of one of the now-convicted rapists before the trial, emphasizing his glorious football career. CNN anchor Candy Crowley and correspondent Poppy Harlow, where most of the online rage has now been aimed, talked about how difficult it was to watch the convicted rapists break into tears, their good grades and their promising futures now tarnished. Numerous reports discussed just how drunk the victim was on the night in question, with no reference to whether the perpetrators had also partaken in underage drinking, as if this somehow excuses their behaviour.

Well rightly, and I am at least relieved to report, people are angry. I am. This is rape culture in all its repulsive glory. The victim, barely remembered in the media’s stories, has to live with this rape her whole life. How about instead of blaming her for ruining the ‘promising futures’ of these two young men, we blame them for raping in the first place, having no regard for right and wrong, being so proud of their actions that they uploaded them to facebook, twitter etc. to show off to friends and strangers.  The blame for rape should always lay with the rapist and the sooner the media realise this the better off our society will be.

“What do I think of Western civilization? I think it would be a very good idea.”

- Mahatma Gandhi

ACT NOW:

To complain to the BBC, please follow this link.

Demand an on air apology from CNN with this change.org petition.

Posted in Gender, Rape Culture, Victim Blaming, Zero Tolerance, media, rape | Tagged , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Violence against women in the Scottish Media

Posted on February 28, 2013 by admin
It’s the last day of February, and as part of our Handle with Care project I have been keeping watch over the media for 1 month. The idea was to get a sample of media coverage on men’s violence against women, and examine the quality of coverage of these issues. I set up a press cuttings service, and asked them to send me all the stories that featured the words rape, domestic abuse and sexual abuse. We only monitored Scottish press, which included all local titles, national titles and Scottish editions of UK papers.   I assumed there would be a large number of stories but I wasn’t prepared for how many clippings I would receive. Here’s a couple of photos…

This isn’t even all the clips for the month, I am informed that we still have another 200 cuttings in the post! This exercise has been a real eye-opener as to the alarming prevalence of rape, domestic abuse and sexual abuse – only a few aspects of men’s violence against women.

For more information on the Handle With Care Media Project, or to book a training email liz.ely@zerotolerance.org.uk

Posted in Feminism, Gender, Scotland, media | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment

Don’t walk past saunas and look the other way

Posted on January 21, 2013 by admin

Guest blog from Lauren Fox

Lauren is a sculptor who lives in Edinburgh. Her blog is www.laurenffox.blogspot.com and she tweets as @WeldedRockets

Let me start by introducing myself. I am a woman. A feminist (gasp!). I believe in equality. For all. I detest violence against women, and the power imbalance that leads to general acceptance of subordination of any minority makes my blood boil. But I am not an idealist.

Prostitution, as so commonly described in recent months in the press, is the ‘oldest profession in the world’. Actually this isn’t entirely true. Pimping is the oldest profession in the world. But let’s not get distracted. Women and men have sold their bodies for sex since as far as anyone can remember. So, realistically, it isn’t going to suddenly stop now. But I feel very strongly that there are ways it can be made safer, things we can and should be doing to protect women working in the sex industry. (It’s important to mention at this point that men are also exploited and abused as prostitutes within the sex industry – I am not unaware of this. But for the purposes of this blog, which is hosted by Zero Tolerance, an organisation focussed on violence against women, I will refer to the women involved.)

To this end, last November, I found myself at Edinburgh’s City Chambers, 50% of the total number of objectors to the relicensing of one of the ‘saunas’, whose license was up for renewal along with 14 other saunas in Edinburgh. Saunas in Edinburgh are well known for being brothels, and Edinburgh is apparently one of the UK’s top venues for sex tourists, as sex is so easily found and bought, behind closed doors of course.

Since 2001, when the unofficial ‘red-light-zone’ was scrapped by police in Edinburgh, prostitution has moved behind closed doors. And while the argument goes that this is safer for the women ‘sex workers’, as they are off the streets, I believe that the current system of licensing saunas is so flawed that there is no reason to believe prostitution behind closed doors is any safer for anyone. The fact that the women are out of public view means in itself prostitution, and the issues around it are out of sight, and thus more likely to be out of the mind of the general public too. And the unmonitored, unregulated closed door means that potential abuse, exploitation, violence and trafficking is also out of sight, rendering the women working as prostitutes even more vulnerable than before.

Unfortunately Edinburgh City Council refuses to acknowledge any of these issues. And, it seems, they would actually rather claim ignorance than any sort of responsibility at all. Which is a shame, as the councillors are elected representatives of the public, and are supposed to represent the likes of you and me. So, the transparency of the charade at the City Chambers on November 6 took me a bit by surprise.

The Licensing committee is made up of 12 councillors from across the city. One of whom, the vice convenor, is my local councillor and actually helped me in the process of submitting my objection to the committee. As an objector I was invited to appear before the committee, alongside the applicant (which makes this process intimidating from the start) to state my objection. After apparently being indulged long enough to state my objection, the councillors unanimously agreed to vote to relicense the sauna in question, without even leaving the room to consider what I had said. The potential that they were relicensing an existing, unmonitored brothel, and thus aiding and abetting criminal activity was apparently not of interest or concern to them, and my objections fell on deaf ears.

Even more amazing, was that when my co-objector stated his (lengthy and thorough) objection at the beginning of the session, which included the availability of evidence on the internet to prove what was happening in the saunas, he was asked if he ‘believed everything he saw on the internet’. It really blew me away that not only is it up to members of the public like myself, and like him, to find and bring evidence to the councillors, but that their one question to anyone during the proceedings was to try and discredit him. This is amazing because of the transparency of the collaboration between the Council, the Police and the people that are running the brothels/’saunas’. At least we could have been humoured by our objections apparently being taken seriously and investigated. But no. A unanimous vote passed for all of the licenses. Even my councillor who cared enough to help me object decided to vote to relicense. This is not necessary – a majority vote would pass the motion, not everyone needed to comply. But not one single councillor decided to even raise enough concern to investigate the issues brought to their attention by me and the other objector. Which makes it quite apparent that they are also under pressure to ignore, to turn a blind eye, or however they justify to themselves the complete disregard for fairness, safety, and even the law.

I was offered the chance to appeal the licensing committee’s decision to the Sheriff Court but at a cost – there is a standard administration fee of £80. As this is something I could not afford I was left with no choice but to drop the appeal.

All of this makes it clear that the council can, or will, do nothing to help change the current situation of the unofficial approval of brothel-keeping in Edinburgh. There has to be a better way than this. And however we regulate prostitution, we should provide more support to the women working in saunas that are not making a choice, but are forced into prostitution by poverty, cycles of abuse, violence, homelessness and powerlessness. I am not worried about women like ‘Laura’, a prostitute and ‘high class escort’ recently interviewed by Radio Scotland’s The Investigation, who is apparently happy and empowered by her chosen line of work, which she loves. Laura is in the minority. Most women do not love ‘working’ as prostitutes, research suggests that the vast majority work get involved in prostitution because they feel they have no choice, and they are affected by the issues just mentioned. Which makes it all the more sickening to read the explicit, disgusting and graphic ‘reviews’ of prostitutes written by ‘punters’ available online. This is not fair, this is not equal. This is about imbalance of power and violence against women. And all of us that sit back and do nothing, or walk past a sauna and look the other way, are complicit in sustaining Edinburgh’s denial of the issue, and disregard for some of its most vulnerable citizens.

Posted in Brothel, Prostitution, Sauna, Scotland, Scottish Government | Tagged , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Are all your Christmasses Pink and Blue?

Posted on December 3, 2012 by admin

By Liz Ely, Development Officer (Capacity Building), Zero Tolerance

Christmas is coming! Whether you celebrate it or not it is hard to avoid as advertising for the latest toys, perfumes and calorific treats fill our television screens.  As the recession bites, Christmas is becoming more and more difficult for families struggling to make ends meet. It’s a time when a variety of different oppressions and inequalities are brought to the fore, including gender inequality.

A number of different adverts this year have decided to take a semi ironic sexism as their selling point.  ASDA’s ‘Behind every Christmas there’s a mum’ (behind every mum there’s an ungrateful jerk who asks what’s for tea at the end of the day) enraged viewers. Morrison’s went down a similar line, Christmas is stressful for women – but they love doing all the work really. Both of these adverts heavily emphasised the fact that making Christmas is a women’s job by presenting domestic work as a glorified, but inevitable, task for women.

The idea that women’s place is in the home, brings with it the unspoken assumption that their place is not outside of it, limiting our potential for power in society. These limitations on women’s power begin very early, many years before they will be expected to make a Christmas dinner.  Toys for children have over the past decade become increasingly shaped by gendered assumptions and the British Christmas 2012 is no different.

The current Barclay-card advert specifically tells boys they can’t play with dolls, as a lone male shopper struggles to work out what toy to buy – a giant talking monkey informs him that on no account should he buy a Barbie for a boy (and throws in a sexualised comment about Barbie’s plastic boobs – NB it’s still sexist even if it’s a talking monkey saying it).  Some toy shops clearly divide toys by gender, where others divide symbolically through blue and pink aisles. Children’s toys and media have a tendency to underrepresent girls, as this young girl found out whilst playing Guess Who, a game where less than 1/3 of the characters are female. This statistic mirrors research by the Geena Davis institute into children’s media where only 1/3 of characters on screen are female.

I spy with my little eye… 5 women!

Though it may seem frivolous, how we treat very young children lays foundations for inequality in later life. In her book ‘delusions of gender’ Cordellia fine demonstrates that representations of women and men have a powerful effect on achievement.  The perception that women are weak at maths and sciences, for example, has a profound impact upon their abilities. It is in the earliest years of life that these perceptions and ideas are formed.

It doesn’t have to be this way! In Sweden where gender equality is taken seriously, Top Toy (which creates catalogues for Toys R Us) has created a gender neutral catalogue in response to complaints about previous offerings.  “We have produced the catalogues in a completely different way this year,” Nyberg said. “For several years, we have found that the gender debate has grown so strong in the Swedish market that we… have had to adjust.”

At Zero Tolerance we are committed to ending gender inequality, the root cause of gender based violence. We and want the ‘gender debate’ to be a powerful force in Scotland as it is in Scandinavia. For this reason, early next year Zero Tolerance will launch guidance on gender equality in the early years, looking at how we can work to build a better more equal society with the children we care for.

In the meantime here’s a Christmas list with a difference – 5 ways to have a Christmas that is a little less pink or blue, the perfect antidote to infuriating shopping trips and aggravating adverts.

  1. Gift a child in your life with something gender neutral! Chose something that inspires their imaginations, rather than limiting them. Why not buy a girl a science set, or crafts for a boy?
  2. Start a conversation about gender with a child in your life. Do they think there should be boy’s toys and girl’s toys? What do they think about male and female characters in films?
  3. Write to companies who impose gender stereotypes on children. Toys in Sweden changed their policy as a result of consumer pressure, and Hamleys and Harrods in the UK changed their labelling policy as a result of a campaign started by one mum.
  4. Where possible set a good example of equality for your children at Christmas, what your children see you do has an impact upon their belief systems.  If you’re a man, make sure you do your share of the hard work that goes into Christmas.
  5. Educate yourself and stay informed about others taking action:  @genderdiary tweet about their experiences of child rearing and share lots of interesting stories ,  See Jane is a campaign by the Geena Davies institute to increase representation of girls in children’s media and Pink Stinks have lots of information about challenging girlie girl culture.

Posted in Early Years, Gender, children, prevention education | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment

Men Engaging in Feminism

Posted on November 21, 2012 by admin

Guest blog from Talat Yaqoob, White Ribbon Scotland

The issue of men engaging in feminism has, and continues to be, controversial.

Whether it’s men attending Reclaim the Night Marches or men being quoted about their thoughts on rape culture, feminists often double take and worry about what that involvement means. So they should.

Women have continued to raise their voices because they were not being heard, because men were talking on their behalf and often saying the wrong things. However, when done the right way, men engaging in women’s rights can be hugely positive.

At White Ribbon Scotland, we work with men to tackle violence against women. We do this through campaigning, education and, perhaps most importantly, working alongside women’s organisations. We believe men can, and should be, engaged in the feminist movement, but as allies not decision makers. That, quite simply, is it.

The White Ribbon Campaign was first created in 1991 in Canada by a group of men who felt strongly about tackling violence against women, after a shooting of 14 female students at the University of Montreal. Since then the campaign has gone global and White Ribbon Scotland began in 2008.

We see women’s rights as human rights and as such believe it is the duty of men, as well as women, to engage in creating a world where women are equal, safe and heard. However, we do this whilst respecting a platform for women only to make their decisions and respecting the need for a safe space for women only to voice their experiences.

With two women dying each week in the UK as a consequence of domestic abuse and 1 in 4 women worldwide experiencing domestic abuse at some point in their lives, ending violence against women is everyone’s issue. The vast majority of victims of sexual, psychological and domestic abuse are women and the majority of perpetrators are men. It is not the responsibility of women to stop it from happening to themselves; it is the responsibility of men to not commit, condone or remain silent about violence against women.

I remember this campaign from Rape Crisis Scotland “Top 10 tips to Stop Rape”. The tips are for men. I think this says it all.

We still live in a patriarchal society with structures in place which allow the continuation of gender based violence. To break these structures, we need to educate those that benefit from it without even realising its existence and change how they think, how they act and how they benefit. Most men don’t go about in their everyday life knowingly disempowering women; by campaigning and educating we can highlight the inequality that men maintain without realising it. Most men do not commit violence against women, but by campaigning and educating, we can ensure that most becomes all. For all of these reasons, and more, White Ribbon Scotland work’s with men and helps them to engage in tackling violence against women in the appropriate and most effective ways.

Find out more are www.whiteribbonscotland.org.uk

Posted in Feminism, Scotland, White Ribbon Scotland, men | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment

Treated like a Commodity: PunterNet and Prostitution Review Sites

Posted on October 24, 2012 by admin

Having never frequented a prostitute or brothel personally, I was naively unaware that much like that PS3 game you bought on Amazon or that second hand tea dress purchased on eBay, customers or ‘punters’ are encouraged to give feedback on their ‘purchases’, or in this case the women they have bought for 45 minutes, an hour or two etc.

Sites like PunterNet, described by the London Evening Standard as “…the most successful of the prostitute-reviewing Internet sites”, collate these reviews so that you, the client, can make an informed choice about the woman you wish to buy.

Having done a quick search of the Edinburgh area only, here are just a few examples of some of the feedback these women, and girls, have received.

Please note: These are direct quotes taken from clients and, as you can imagine, they tend to be very sexually explicit. I would also like to put a trigger warning at this point as some of this language may be upsetting. All names have been changed.

Positive Reviews (Recommended to other potential clients)

“…Is intelligent and puts you at ease with great conversation…. good at licking my scrotum…. fully encouraged me to cum over her breasts--which I did with porn-star-like style. She’s great!!”

“Probably the cleanest and nicest fanny I’ve ever licked”

“I rubbed my cock all over her face to rub the spunk in. I felt brilliant. That was so special.”

“Well worth the money… next time I’ll fuck her before I’m tossed and sucked beyond all hope.”

“Wondered if she was as eager as she looked. As it turns out, a very willing cock sucker and a great kisser.”

“I got her to use her dildo on herself while i held her head and really fucked her face, shooting a load all over her boobs and chin – dirty cow!”

“I just love having the old tadger inside this lovely lady and fucking her for the (very) great deal that she is worth.”

What struck me most about the so-called positive reviews was the abundance of the word ‘I’: “I rubbed my cock all over her face…I felt brilliant”, “which I did with porn-star-like style.”, “I’ll fuck her before I’m tossed and sucked beyond all hope.” It seems once a woman has been paid for, she is the client’s to do with as he pleases. In one review a client describes how he made a particular woman use a sex toy on herself and held her head down while he “fucked her face”, the client then goes on to describe the woman as a “dirty cow”. The irony of this seems lost on said client; he has paid for her to do these things, and as such expects them to be done, when the woman does perform these acts, due to needing the money, she is a “dirty cow”.

Negative Reviews

“Enthusiastic and a good fuck. However at £70 notes this was far from what I would call good value.”

“Cost is too high. Parlours need refreshed. Girls are getting old.”

“Nice looking, but so high on drugs.”

“Diane looked a bit uninterested so I chose Amanda.”

“Booked for 45 minutes…. I was told politely but firmly not to touch her pussy…. Stopped every ten or so seconds to wipe her mouth on a piece of tissue paper…. Awkward hand activity…. A big disappointment.”

“Buoyed up by the physical look of Amanda, the good time I looked forward to never happened. She might as well raise a “Do Not Touch” sign, for everything appears out of bounds. She doesn’t cum, she doesn’t respond to oral, she doesn’t like have her breasts or nipples or pussy touched.”

“Just isn’t worth spending time with. I’ll stick to the genuinely leggy lovelies in (name of specific sauna removed), all of whom I’ve written up, and all of whom have been given deserved praise and credit.”

“Appeared nothing to write home about”

In some ways I find the negative reviews even more distressing. These women are often chastised for not having as good a time as the clients would like/expect given their clear sexual prowess. “Stopped every ten or so seconds to wipe her mouth on a piece of tissue paper”; “She doesn’t cum, she doesn’t respond to oral, she doesn’t like have her breasts or nipples or pussy touched.” What becomes immediately apparent is that not only do these women have to be available for sex, in any orifice, 24/7 they must also do a good job of pretending they are into it or risk an unfavourable review, which could result in a lack of clients, and subsequently a loss in earnings. I am not here to argue whether or not some of these women enjoy their jobs, however to assume they are all gleefully ‘up-for-it’ with any, and all, of the differing men that walk through their doors is just wilful ignorance.

General Reviews

“On looks and figure Tiffany is better. Would i return too Tanya – possibly, but having visited theres others i’d like to see”

“I noticed condom was soaking, guess she got to cum more times than I did…. Hard to say if i’d go back with the choice available in the city but you never know.”

These last two were included to show how much power lies with the client, and perhaps slightly to roll my eyes in scornful pity at the sentence “She got to cum more times than I did….” yeah, I’m sure she did.  But the real point is these men are effectively saying ‘don’t do a good job, well there are plenty of other girls ready and willing to take your place, so put on a good show’. And unlike the many TV shows and films that portray prostitutes and prostitution as independent, glamorous career choices these two reviews show where the real power lies: with the person paying.

This is just a small selection of the 1000’s upon 1000’s of reviews available on many different prostitute reviewing websites. And aside from the obvious extremely derogatory way these women are described: “dirty cow”, “willing cock sucker”, “ready fanny”, “girls are getting old”. It’s phrases like, “not what I would call good value”; “Well worth the money”; and “A big disappointment” that could have been taken from any retailers product reviews and truly show how these women, often from backgrounds including poverty and abuse, are viewed – nothing more than a commodity to be bought and sold and they better damn well like it, or at least be a hell of a good actress.

Posted in Prostitution, Scotland, United Kingdom, Zero Tolerance | Tagged , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Zero Tolerance Valentines – Here’s to the the men who are part of the solution

Posted on February 14, 2012 by admin

The Anti Porn Men Project
This Valentines Day, here at Zero Tolerance, we are taking the opportunity to celebrate campaigns led by men that seek to tackle men’s violence against women. Today, like every other day, many women will be abused by the men they love and trust. Here’s to the men who are part of the solution.

If you know of a similar campaign you think we should celebrate let us know!

White Ribbon Scotland
This is part of a global campaign, led by men and boys committed to taking
action to stop violence against women. Do you support White Ribbon Scotland?
Why not engage other men to join the campaign and speak out by becoming a
White Ribbon Speaker.

The Anti Porn Men Project
This is a UK based website that promotes critical thinking about porn
culture, and sexualisation.

The Real Men campaign
This Campaign brings men together, to the promote diversity and difference
of Oreal men’, thereby dispelling the male macho stereotype and sending out
the message that Real Men do not abuse and control women – physically sexually or financially.

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Pink Saris: Documentary Film Review

Posted on October 5, 2011 by admin

Pink Saris is a documentary film about the extraordinary and outspoken activist Samoat Pal who founded the gulabis, otherwise known as the pink gang. Dedicating her life to fighting social injustice, and helping young lower caste women in rural India, accompanied by her accordingly attired followers, Pal confronts communities, facing up to people who have abused women and valued their lives as worthless, posing questions on subjects that are either avoided or routinely ignored.

Directed by Kim Longinotto, the film is aesthetically interesting giving the audience a multifaceted insight into abuse, injustice and responsibility.  As the film runs its course Longinotto allows the contradictions within Pal’s character to become apparent. Relishing the limelight, her declaration “I am a messiah for women”, is a statement in definite contradiction to her overarching quest to emancipate women by breaking the shackles of custom and tradition.

Born into a low caste, married as a child and abused by her in-laws, Pal fled the family home plunging herself into a period of extreme poverty and isolation. Experience and approach gives weight to her activism, asking a man who had routinely raped and abused his daughter-in-law, “do you know what domestic violence is?” she gives language to traditionally unspoken abuses. This language thus facilitates a shift in consciousness, inspires discussion and forces people to acknowledge responsibility.

Pink Saris will be screened at the Filmhouse in Edinburgh as part of the Scottish Women’s Aid 35th anniversary events at 18:00 Sunday 23rd October.

Author: Diane Prayle

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The Legal Regulation of Prostitution in Scotland

Posted on September 29, 2011 by admin

Philippa Greer outlines how an outdated and simplistic legal approach to prostitution ignores the women involved and the current political conceptualisation of prostitution as ‘violence against women’.

The present law on prostitution in Scotland is both unhelpful and contradictory, casting prostitutes as deviants by prioritising concerns of public nuisance. Our current legal approach neglects the harm inflicted on the sellers of sex and stands in sharp contrast to contemporary political conceptualisations of prostitution as of ‘violence against women.’

Prostitution has a confusing legal status in Scotland since the exchange of sexual services for cash does not constitute a crime itself – merely the surrounding activities to prostitution which transgress into the public sphere. Thus, from the outset, this uncertain legal environment fails to reflect contemporary views of prostitution as harm to women rather than by women.

Accordingly, prostitutes are targeted by our law in respect of the nuisance caused to communities by prostitution. Our criminal justice system essentially classes prostitution as a strand of ‘anti-social behaviour’- with solicitation, importuning and loitering by a prostitute in a public place being a criminal offence (with solicitation also being criminal if it occurs in an area that is visible to the public).[1]

It is the very fact that such behaviour is visible in public that creates the offence. As well as overlooking the intrinsic harms caused to the prostitute, such offences actually serve to heighten the risk of harm to the women involved since they have less time to assess clients, often getting into cars more readily in an attempt to avoid attracting attention. They also prompt displacement, forcing prostitutes into less visible areas unmonitored by surveillance, the police and other prostitutes – whilst placing them further from the visibility of outreach agencies. Consequently, this approach completely overlooks the women involved in prostitution, by viewing prostitution purely as ‘nuisance caused to communities’.

Furthermore, prostitutes may be subject to ASBOs[2]- which serves to reinforce their deviant status within Scotland’s legal framework. Although primarily a civil sanction, breach of an order is a criminal offence punishable by a fine or imprisonment of up to 5 years.[3] Imposed upon street prostitutes, ASBOs have been and will continue to be breached. Excluding the women from specific areas merely serves to relocate the problem to neighbouring areas, or indoors, making it infinitely more dangerous for the sellers of sex. The risk of obtaining a criminal record also serves to alienate the women from society, operating as a barrier to exiting prostitution and entering alternative employment.

Additionally, the law restricts the personal relationships that a prostitute may develop by virtue of imposing offences on the profiting of prostitution, which often catch in their ambit the boyfriends or partners of prostitutes. For example, it is illegal for a male person to live on the earnings of prostitution.[4] Accordingly, those who are closely involved with prostitutes may be legally suspect. Although theoretically necessary in respect of targeting pimps, a man only needs to be proven to: “live with or be habitually in the company of”[5] a prostitute to be guilty of living on the earnings of prostitution. This makes no distinction between genuine pimps and men who are the sons, boyfriends or husbands of women involved in prostitution.

Moreover, despite political conceptualisations of prostitution as ‘violence against women’, there appears to be a reluctance to call into question the client’s role in the sexual transaction. Soliciting and loitering for the purpose of obtaining the services of a prostitute – often referred to as ‘kerb-crawling’ – is criminal merely if it occurs in a public place.[6] Thus it is purely the public nature of the client’s behaviour which is targeted by our criminal law in Scotland.

This is particularly questionable when one considers that the rise of the Internet, mobile telephony and indoor prostitution has allowed clients to access sex privately and anonymously – without social stigmatisation or fear of law enforcement. The fact that it remains legal in Scotland for a man to buy sex creates confusion and clearly sends a mixed message to society in respect of Scotland’s stance on this issue. By failing to confront the acceptability of buying sex, our fragmented laws communicate a dangerous message that as long as no nuisance or harm transgresses into the public arena, prostitution is ultimately harmless.

Accordingly, our laws on prostitution ought to be framed in light of the inherent harm caused to the prostitute, by projecting a vital, concrete message of “zero tolerance” to buying sex. Selling sexual services is done at a great emotional cost to those involved, regardless of whether or not it transgresses into the public sphere, yet our present law in Scotland fails to reflect this.

[1] s.46 of the Civic Government (Scotland) Act 1982.

[2] s.19 of the Crime and Disorder Act 1998.

[3] s.22(1)(b) of the Crime and Disorder Act 1998.

[4] s.11(1) of the Criminal Law (Consolidation) (Scotland) Act 1995 contains offences relating to “male persons” who live on the earnings of prostitution. s.7(1) contains offences aimed at those who seek to procure women to ‘work’ as prostitutes.

[5] s.11(3) of the Criminal Law (Consolidation) (Scotland) Act 1995.

[6] Or a place to which at the material time the public are allowed to have access under s.1(6) of the Prostitution (Public Places) (Scotland) Act 2007.

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